Sometimes I worry about what kind of a mother I’ll be. Will I be the mom that lets kids figure things out on their own. or will I be a helicopter mom? My love language is touch, so I highly doubt that I’ll be able to keep a distance from my kids. Then there’s how I am with my dogs.
Chip and Daisy (Chip mostly, as we had him a solid 2 years since he was a puppy before we got Daisy) have enjoyed many luxuries unknown to other dogs. Here are some ways to know if you have a first-world dog.
1. Your dog picks his seat in the car.
Chip likes being the co-pilot in the car. As in, he insists on sitting on the driver’s lap as they drive. The passenger seat is not good enough for him. Not even with a person’s lap boosting him up. Nope. He needs to be in the driver’s seat.
And I always let him have it. Judge away.
2. He gets his butt wiped
When we first got Chip, I would have puppy wipes near the door to wipe all four of his feet and his butt. Looking back, I was utterly ridiculous. Who wipe’s their dog’s bottom every time they come inside? I only hope that I’ve gotten all my mommy “crazies” out with my first kid, Chip. I don’t wipe either furry butt now (unless they have a blow-out).
3. They eat food only found in boutiques.
We only feed Chip and Daisy Orijen. For an embarrassing list of reasons, you can read my post about it here. And yes, I have bought them several 3-foot-long beef jerky treats. Judge me some more.
4. They dictate the climate control
I can’t count the number of times I turn the air conditioning on in the car just because Chip is panting. My husband especially loves this (insert huge eye roll).
5. They get to pick their spot in YOUR bed
It was never my idea to have a dog share a bed with me. I never had a pet growing up (unless you count canaries) so having an animal sleep in bed with me was a foreign concept. B insisted Chip sleep in bed with us.
Oh, we tried crate-training. Chip whined and cried for hours for over a week. I even put his crate on my nightstand. The cries continued. So we let him on the bed. Not a peep. (side eye).
Now? Chip and Daisy have their spots picked out in bed. We literally are restricted from thrashing in bed for fear that one of the dogs will fly across the room.
First world dogs I tell you.
6. They have high-tech toys
My husband splurged at Brookstone sometime last year. I didn’t understand at first what he was talking about when he called me, but when he got home with this I nearly died. It is a mechanical ball controlled by Bluetooth. Apparently, for our first-world dogs, a regular ball (or stick), is not good enough. They need a mechanical ball for entertainment.
jackie says
ah SO cute. it’s probably no secret my dogs are spoiled. bowie nearly pushes me off of the bed every night and I don’t stop him because I want him to be comfy. and I buy them a ridiculous amount of fancy treats/toys. so so spoiled.
Lisette says
Haha sounds like us!
Daisy sleeps at my side and Chip by my feet. It’s a wonder I get any real sleep at night.
Elizabeth says
Oh, yes! Our dog goes to play with my sister-in-law’s dogs every. single. day. We take him with us everywhere we can and he sleeps on the bed. Spoiled rotten!
Paige says
Sounds just like our dogs! I tell myself that I am preparing for motherhood because most nights I’ve got a dog laying on my chest.
Lisette says
That’s how I see it too!
Meghan says
#5 all the way for my dogs!
Vivian says
This made me laugh so hard… only because it’s the same way in my house!! The dog rules the roost haha! Have a great Wednesday!
Paige @ The Sticky Note Addict says
Gatsby only gets stuff from boutiques, too! But even those toys and treats go to waste, because his favorite chew toys to date have been my brand new Nike running shoes and a pair of Uggs!
Kristin @ Crumbs and Curls says
This sounds like my dog! She definitely runs the house! She is a diva!
Kristin
Kenzie ♥ says
This post is too funny! Our pups are a little spoiled, but nothing like this :D
Jessa O says
Heisman is a first world dog too!! We rotate the treats too so he’ll them. He is crazy!
Krystal says
This made me laugh. My dog Rocco is so spoiled. He totally runs the house and knows it. I really want to go to Brookstone to look for that toy now too.
Krystal
Lisa @ Two Martinis says
Of course Ozzie is a first world dog… And he also totally sits on the driver’s lap in the car as long as we let him. Although recently I got a bit concerned about the safety of that and now we keep him confined to the back seat. But he still picks his spot in the bed! Sometimes I wake up hanging halfway off the bed because Ozzie has decided to take up my ENTIRE half. How do small dogs take up so much freakin’ room?!
Jessica says
Haha…just like our dog! When I first got Sophie, my future husband said I’d have to get rid of her when we got married because dogs are “a waste of money”. I laughed in his face. Now he’d save her over me, which I am completely fine with. But really, this fits her to a t. Plus she has more toys than most human children.
Amanda says
Bahahaha… Johnny Cakes definitely qualifies!!!!!!! He’s the tiniest, biggest bed hog EVER!
Rachel says
I loved reading this post! It was so funny! Your doggies are adorable! My husband and I are exactly the same with our Labrador, Honey. I’m totally familiar with the temperature control, butt wiping, the toys to ‘exercise their brains’ and the bed situation is a given! :) We don’t have any children yet but take care of Honey just like she is our baby. I also make her freezable meals (plain chicken, veg and potato or rice) sometimes too *ok, feeling a bit more embarrassed now, oops* but its only if I’m cooking in bulk for us anyway and also to supplement her dog food (blue buffalo) which is quite expensive. I do all of this because she’s kept me company and been there for me when times were incredibly tough. I moved with her to a new country 4 years ago and during the day, she’s been my only company. I don’t have any family or friends nearby either so I feel it my responsibility to just give her the best life possible. Btw, I just found your lovely blog on pinterest and I’ll be back soon to read more! Nice photos too!
Joanna Farmer says
So cute!! I have my own little fluff ball and she is definitely first world; she carries her pink boa scarf around with her everywhere!
Melissa says
Haha, love it! Such an interesting perspective of the traditional #firstworldproblems. But really…if you have a dog and it’s not spoiled like this, what’s the point of even having a dog?!